As we commence the last month of a very tumultuous year, I feel my whole being yearn for the respite and introspection of the winter ahead. These months have held so much for our tender human hearts that I have found it challenging, impossible at times, to sit and write about the impact of these experiences in my life. I’m sure I’m not alone with these feelings.
This is the beginning of the end: of a calendar year, of a hurtful and hate-filled presidency, and hopefully… of our forgetting how deeply interconnected we truly are.
As the sun set last night I made my way to our garden, to close up the chicken coop and harvest some kale for dinner. The clouds were hot pink in their last dazzling hurrah before darkness. While there I ran into Tahz, one of our master farmers and soil wizards at Earthseed. He reached out to touch me, to show me how cold his fingers had gotten while tending to the garden.
Much to my surprise he wasn’t at all disgruntled by the frigid weather, instead I saw a twinkle in his eyes, I would even say he was excited about the upcoming season. When I asked if this was due to the promise of rest that winter offers a farmer, he said that was only a small part of it. What Tahz was more excited about was what cold weather meant for the soil.
Winter also means the soil gets a moment of rest, he explained– a reintegration of sorts. I wondered if like us, the soil also takes a moment to reflect on all that it has held and to prepare for whatever may come.
We get to experience endings all the time in microscopic and monumental ways on this land. Oftentimes with regret, but sometimes with sweet release and celebration. I am certain that there is more heartbreak to be experienced, more loss to grieve in the months to come. And right now I am grateful that in this in-between time, where we simultaneously get to honor the goodness and the necessity of the sacred pause.